On October 13, 2016, King Bhumibol Adulyadej of Thailand passed away. At the time, he was the world's longest reigning monarch; that title now belonging to Queen Elizabeth of England. In accordance with royal burial rights, there was a year of mourning culminating with his funeral and cremation on 26 October 2017.
In the days leading up to this momentous occasion the typicaly chaotic capital city of Bangkok projected a unified, subdued look and feel of a nation who's political future is uncertain at best. The new King's accession is mostly ceremonial since a militaty coup took control in 2014. The first national elections have been scheduled for next year...LOL. Black and white cloths drape the city. Photos of the beloved king were everywhere. The country loved their King even if the 1% did not.
It is difficult to overstate the significance of this moment in history. For the Thai people--all accross the country--the day of his cremation represented the first time that 7-11 convienence stores closed...for a few hours.
I enjoy visiting a country during a time of celebration. All of the normal tourist activities are still on offer, but one is forced to learn about the people and culture that so often go overlooked.
When to visit Southeast Asia depends mostly on how much you like warm weather. For my part, I feel one should visit in the regularly hot season rather than the rediculously, oppressively hot season. The day after my arrival in Bangkok, the temperature on my weather app was a shoulder-seasony high of 81F (27C). The next line, though, said it "feels like" 97F (36C). It's nice being here in the cool, dry season!
I spent a few days recovering from the jetlag and finding perspective between the drunken, international backpackers and solemn, black-dressed locals. Defering to my anti-city side I transfered from BKK to the island paradise of Koh Chang.
Koh Chang sits along the Northeast of the Gulf of Thailand, almost to the Cambodian border. Unlike other islands, Chang is largely undeveloped; owing to more than 80% of it being a national park.
With its numerous hiking trails, waterfalls, and scuba diving locations one could spend a week and feel as though they have only scratched the surface of ways to explore and enjoy.
And, so, I spent a week laying in a hammock, laying on a beach, laying in a blow-up lounge chair on the water...mango smoothy in hand, and eating at a different Bob Marley themed restaurant every night. I must confess, I could use some rest. I can't run at this pace very long.
It's a 5hr transfer from Koh Chang to Phnom Phen, Cambodia. Or, at least that is what I was told. Border crossings and dealing with shady "helpers" can either put a damper on travels or be the highlight of one's adventure. I'll call it the latter and just say that the experience lasted 15hrs.
Wednesday, December 13, 2017
Cambodia: November, 2017
Earlier this year I had the opportunity to visit Cambodia. At that time, I was just a tourist and spent every day seeing the country just as it appears in most brochures; which, very unfairly, defines what this country once was, decades and centuries ago, rather that what it is now.
On this trip I spent more time wandering the cities, eating from food stalls, and laughing with the locals who were laughing at me for my reaction to seeing skinned dog heads, twice-cooked rat, and assorted "meats" on sticks that make even Vienna Sausages look appetizing.
"Good" food in Cambodia is on a different scale from other countries in Southeast Asia.
Noodles here are packages of Romin. Though rice is grown it is mostly exported rather than consumed locally.
In the larger cities you will find flavors from around the world. I, unknowingly, stayed in the Indian quarter of Phnom Penh were I had the best curry I've tasted in a long time.
But I am not a foodie; by that I mean I mostly eat out of necessity; and, yes chocolate is a necessity; but what the Cambodian palette lacks is offset by how rediculously cheap it is. Seriously. A filling meal for under $1. And far better for you than KFC; who, along with many other American staples, has taken root here.
Oh, and I picked up a SIM card that gave me 5gig of data to use in 1 week. That also set me back $1. It's refillable, too, or you can pay $3 upfront for 20gig/month.
The capital city of Phnom Penh is constantly alive. Dive into the dark tent markets for food, clothes, jewelry, a doctor, a haircut, a sip of something that would be better off as fule for a motorbike. Put your dexterity and contortionism skills to the test by joining a shuttlecock kicking game in What Botum Park. Families pack onto the grass day and night to picnic in front of the Royal Palace. Travelers and locals alike crowd the streets of "Bar Town": A moniker I made up for the endless peep-show-like bars and hotels just North of the Royal Palace. There is a dizzying array of coffee shops in the more upscale, "Western" neighborhood Southwest of Independence Monument. Win or lose you will deffinitely leave with a smile amidst the opulence of Naga World Entertainment Complex and Casino. And definitely spend time admiring the gem of the city, Riverside Path, which stretches several kilometers along the Tonle Sap River.
The river, by the way, is the main attraction for part of the year. Water normally flows from the Tonle Sap Lake to its confluence with the Mekong River in PP. However, towards the end of the dry season, March/April, the lake level drops below that of the Mekong. The direction of the flow of the Tonle Sap River changes and water flows from the Mekong to the Lake. As the rains return and the lake raises, the water reverts back to its orriginal direction (October/November). It is, perhaps, the only river in the world that changes its direction.
After taking in all the festivities of the King's Coronation Day on October 29th, I forked over the rediculous sum of $11USD to fly from PP to Siem Reap.
Previously, I had explored the enormous temple complex of Angkor Wat just North of town. As with PP, this time I stayed clear of what for many is the only reason to visit Siem Reap.
I also took up residence at the same guesthouse; Two Dragons. There is something comforting about looking into the eyes of the receptionist, hers into yours, and hearing the words, "Welcome to the Two Dragons". Oh well, maybe next time.
After a long day of temple exploration, most visitors let their hair down around Pub Street: rightly named for a few short streets filled with bars and clubs that put Bourbon Street to shame.
I, however, came to town for the Water Festival. Bonn Om Toeuk is the Khmer celebration of the end of the rainy season and the beginning of the fishing season. The Carnival atmosphere is something to behold as the town of 230,000 almost doubles. For three days streets are shut, makeshift shopping areas are erected, fireworks light the skys, music is everywhere, and dragon boats are raced on the Siem Reap River.
When you visit, leave the revelers to their vices and dig a little deeper. SR has become home to many expats who are doing some amazing things. For starters, there are foods from around the world, though perhaps only one restaurant for each instead of several. I found a bar called "Local" that is the only bar in town making craft beer. Many musicians have taken up residence as well. My friend Scott Povey reintroduced me to jazz on my first visit and a few of his fellow musicians played at Charcoal one night.
I also had the great pleasure of meeting Bill and Jill Morse who started the Cambodia Landmine Museum and build schools throughout the country. Siem Reap may seem small, but it has alot going for it.
Other than ancient temples, there is also a growing tourism industry for showing off the floating towns in the Tonle Sap Lake. Be forewarned that these tours often come with a strong-arm pitch to buy food for starving children. Even the locals say you are wasting your money if you chose to give.
There is, however, an alternative. Instead of $40USD to go out-and-back, you can pay $20 for a boat ride from Siem Reap to Battambang; complete with floating villages, drowned trees (in high water), and the occasional running aground. There are few standard paths as the water level and what is in it changes frequently. The boat ride took 6 hours...8 for the door-to-door service.
Battambang is the second largest city in Cambodia: But you would never guess it. Compared to PP, SR, or anywhere really, BB is quiet and laid back. It almost has an air of being a sleepy frontier town.
The one thing you absolutely must do when you visit is to see the circus. No taming of beasts or nightmare-inducing clowns, the Phare Ponleu Selpak art school teaches thematic acribatics similar to Cirque du Soleil. Several nights each week the sudents perform under a big-top tent on the campus. The school is the hub of an arts revival for all mediums and while Battambang's tourism industry is only in its infancy, some of the aspiring artists here are receiving international recognition.
With the popularity of nearby countries like Vietnam and Thailand, Cambodia is sometimes little more than a side stop for tourists. Take a moment to look closer. There is so much more to experience.
http://www.cambodialandminemuseum.org/
http://www.cambodianselfhelpdemining.org/
On this trip I spent more time wandering the cities, eating from food stalls, and laughing with the locals who were laughing at me for my reaction to seeing skinned dog heads, twice-cooked rat, and assorted "meats" on sticks that make even Vienna Sausages look appetizing.
"Good" food in Cambodia is on a different scale from other countries in Southeast Asia.
Noodles here are packages of Romin. Though rice is grown it is mostly exported rather than consumed locally.
In the larger cities you will find flavors from around the world. I, unknowingly, stayed in the Indian quarter of Phnom Penh were I had the best curry I've tasted in a long time.
But I am not a foodie; by that I mean I mostly eat out of necessity; and, yes chocolate is a necessity; but what the Cambodian palette lacks is offset by how rediculously cheap it is. Seriously. A filling meal for under $1. And far better for you than KFC; who, along with many other American staples, has taken root here.
Oh, and I picked up a SIM card that gave me 5gig of data to use in 1 week. That also set me back $1. It's refillable, too, or you can pay $3 upfront for 20gig/month.
The capital city of Phnom Penh is constantly alive. Dive into the dark tent markets for food, clothes, jewelry, a doctor, a haircut, a sip of something that would be better off as fule for a motorbike. Put your dexterity and contortionism skills to the test by joining a shuttlecock kicking game in What Botum Park. Families pack onto the grass day and night to picnic in front of the Royal Palace. Travelers and locals alike crowd the streets of "Bar Town": A moniker I made up for the endless peep-show-like bars and hotels just North of the Royal Palace. There is a dizzying array of coffee shops in the more upscale, "Western" neighborhood Southwest of Independence Monument. Win or lose you will deffinitely leave with a smile amidst the opulence of Naga World Entertainment Complex and Casino. And definitely spend time admiring the gem of the city, Riverside Path, which stretches several kilometers along the Tonle Sap River.
The river, by the way, is the main attraction for part of the year. Water normally flows from the Tonle Sap Lake to its confluence with the Mekong River in PP. However, towards the end of the dry season, March/April, the lake level drops below that of the Mekong. The direction of the flow of the Tonle Sap River changes and water flows from the Mekong to the Lake. As the rains return and the lake raises, the water reverts back to its orriginal direction (October/November). It is, perhaps, the only river in the world that changes its direction.
After taking in all the festivities of the King's Coronation Day on October 29th, I forked over the rediculous sum of $11USD to fly from PP to Siem Reap.
Previously, I had explored the enormous temple complex of Angkor Wat just North of town. As with PP, this time I stayed clear of what for many is the only reason to visit Siem Reap.
I also took up residence at the same guesthouse; Two Dragons. There is something comforting about looking into the eyes of the receptionist, hers into yours, and hearing the words, "Welcome to the Two Dragons". Oh well, maybe next time.
After a long day of temple exploration, most visitors let their hair down around Pub Street: rightly named for a few short streets filled with bars and clubs that put Bourbon Street to shame.
I, however, came to town for the Water Festival. Bonn Om Toeuk is the Khmer celebration of the end of the rainy season and the beginning of the fishing season. The Carnival atmosphere is something to behold as the town of 230,000 almost doubles. For three days streets are shut, makeshift shopping areas are erected, fireworks light the skys, music is everywhere, and dragon boats are raced on the Siem Reap River.
When you visit, leave the revelers to their vices and dig a little deeper. SR has become home to many expats who are doing some amazing things. For starters, there are foods from around the world, though perhaps only one restaurant for each instead of several. I found a bar called "Local" that is the only bar in town making craft beer. Many musicians have taken up residence as well. My friend Scott Povey reintroduced me to jazz on my first visit and a few of his fellow musicians played at Charcoal one night.
I also had the great pleasure of meeting Bill and Jill Morse who started the Cambodia Landmine Museum and build schools throughout the country. Siem Reap may seem small, but it has alot going for it.
Other than ancient temples, there is also a growing tourism industry for showing off the floating towns in the Tonle Sap Lake. Be forewarned that these tours often come with a strong-arm pitch to buy food for starving children. Even the locals say you are wasting your money if you chose to give.
There is, however, an alternative. Instead of $40USD to go out-and-back, you can pay $20 for a boat ride from Siem Reap to Battambang; complete with floating villages, drowned trees (in high water), and the occasional running aground. There are few standard paths as the water level and what is in it changes frequently. The boat ride took 6 hours...8 for the door-to-door service.
Battambang is the second largest city in Cambodia: But you would never guess it. Compared to PP, SR, or anywhere really, BB is quiet and laid back. It almost has an air of being a sleepy frontier town.
The one thing you absolutely must do when you visit is to see the circus. No taming of beasts or nightmare-inducing clowns, the Phare Ponleu Selpak art school teaches thematic acribatics similar to Cirque du Soleil. Several nights each week the sudents perform under a big-top tent on the campus. The school is the hub of an arts revival for all mediums and while Battambang's tourism industry is only in its infancy, some of the aspiring artists here are receiving international recognition.
With the popularity of nearby countries like Vietnam and Thailand, Cambodia is sometimes little more than a side stop for tourists. Take a moment to look closer. There is so much more to experience.
http://www.cambodialandminemuseum.org/
http://www.cambodianselfhelpdemining.org/
Wake Up!
Have you ever woken up and not known what country you are in?
So, last night started like this...
A German, an Aussie, and an American walk into a bar...
Bangkok, Thailand: October - November, 2017
All that I knew about Bangkok I learned from a song. And, yes, that one night in 2001...
Bangkok! With over 8 million people, it is Southeast Asia's 3rd largest city--if you do not include China. Getting "lost" in a big city allows you to discover its hidden treasures...and the layers of BKK are deep. OK, "deep" is almost inappropriate as this "Venice of the Orient" is actually sinking!
Canals are everywhere and they offer one of the quickest, cheapest ways to go from one part of town to another. There is also an underground rail, or Metro, and an above ground line called the Sky Train. Both are clean and quick, though, only convenient if you are hopping from one shopping center to the next. There are taxis, too, but way over-priced. To really get to know the streets in all their glorious mayhem, take a motorbike taxi: fast, efficient, cheap, and if you are lucky, only stroke inducing rather than the heart attack you would get from riding your own. I chose to walk. If you do the same, keep this in mind: At a two-way street one needs only to look one direction to begin crossing. Halfway through, you look in the other direction.
For one-way streets you need to look both ways at all times.
As with any town there are commercial and tourist centers that are the sole reason most people visit. Between and within these hubs of wallet emptying is where you will find the real city. Stroll along the paths of any one of the numerous parks. Although, stay clear of the green paths: they are reserved for bikes...and cyclist are known world wide for not giving a shit about pedestrians. Just my observation.
Get your tone on at an outdoor gym. Walk the canals and witness the washing machine effect of the commutter boats as they speed past. Loose yourself in the labyrinth of narrow alleys in China Town. Gawk at the unconventional building designs. Amble along the unused rail lines to witness a level of squalor difficult to imagine otherwise. Step into the upper crust past at Jim Thompson's House. Stop along a raised footpath above the never-ending frenetic pace of people and machines. Find a spot along the Chao Prya River and watch the diner cruises and party boats pass by while gaizing up at glass covered sky scrapers reflecting the setting sun.
Or perhaps you crave a more active sceen. Bankok is not lacking in this department. Nightlife starts with "Karaokes" where a girl or guy of your choosing will hum you a song. It gets seedier from there. Ed Sheeran was in town and Bruno Mars is on his way. I happened upon a water polo tournament. On Khao San Road pingpong is very popular...as is the eating of scorpions and other creatures. The streets off of Rama I just behind Embassy Row catter to a more sophisticated crowd: which is to say you will pay more for same thing and they may throw in a new passport photo for free. Night markets are plentiful and many of them do not open until after midnight. Silom Road is good for all that ales you. On the weekend, head to Chatuchak Market: everything you ever didn't know you wanted. And they will ship your shit...I mean, priceless finds...anywhere in the world.
Near Bangkok there are many things to do and see only a day-trip away. Save them for when you need a break from (in)humanity: Like taking the Death Train to Kanchanaburi.
Bangkok! With over 8 million people, it is Southeast Asia's 3rd largest city--if you do not include China. Getting "lost" in a big city allows you to discover its hidden treasures...and the layers of BKK are deep. OK, "deep" is almost inappropriate as this "Venice of the Orient" is actually sinking!
Canals are everywhere and they offer one of the quickest, cheapest ways to go from one part of town to another. There is also an underground rail, or Metro, and an above ground line called the Sky Train. Both are clean and quick, though, only convenient if you are hopping from one shopping center to the next. There are taxis, too, but way over-priced. To really get to know the streets in all their glorious mayhem, take a motorbike taxi: fast, efficient, cheap, and if you are lucky, only stroke inducing rather than the heart attack you would get from riding your own. I chose to walk. If you do the same, keep this in mind: At a two-way street one needs only to look one direction to begin crossing. Halfway through, you look in the other direction.
For one-way streets you need to look both ways at all times.
As with any town there are commercial and tourist centers that are the sole reason most people visit. Between and within these hubs of wallet emptying is where you will find the real city. Stroll along the paths of any one of the numerous parks. Although, stay clear of the green paths: they are reserved for bikes...and cyclist are known world wide for not giving a shit about pedestrians. Just my observation.
Get your tone on at an outdoor gym. Walk the canals and witness the washing machine effect of the commutter boats as they speed past. Loose yourself in the labyrinth of narrow alleys in China Town. Gawk at the unconventional building designs. Amble along the unused rail lines to witness a level of squalor difficult to imagine otherwise. Step into the upper crust past at Jim Thompson's House. Stop along a raised footpath above the never-ending frenetic pace of people and machines. Find a spot along the Chao Prya River and watch the diner cruises and party boats pass by while gaizing up at glass covered sky scrapers reflecting the setting sun.
Or perhaps you crave a more active sceen. Bankok is not lacking in this department. Nightlife starts with "Karaokes" where a girl or guy of your choosing will hum you a song. It gets seedier from there. Ed Sheeran was in town and Bruno Mars is on his way. I happened upon a water polo tournament. On Khao San Road pingpong is very popular...as is the eating of scorpions and other creatures. The streets off of Rama I just behind Embassy Row catter to a more sophisticated crowd: which is to say you will pay more for same thing and they may throw in a new passport photo for free. Night markets are plentiful and many of them do not open until after midnight. Silom Road is good for all that ales you. On the weekend, head to Chatuchak Market: everything you ever didn't know you wanted. And they will ship your shit...I mean, priceless finds...anywhere in the world.
Near Bangkok there are many things to do and see only a day-trip away. Save them for when you need a break from (in)humanity: Like taking the Death Train to Kanchanaburi.
That Look
That look you have when you walk into a bar called The Dragon's Breath. Walls and pool table stained in layers of fluid of unknown origin. The black lights are dim, accentuating the sultry eyes, seductive smiles, and demonic nails of ladies-in-waiting. A strob-light rattles on one of many large speakers blasting out John Denver's "Country Roads".
Thailand: Part 1 October - December, 2017
From its pucture perfect islands in the South to the adventurous highlands of the North, the country has long been the epitome of a tropical parradice. It has been the backdrop for many books and the setting for numerous movies. I believe the main reason for its prominance as a romantic and otherworldly escape is the juxtaposition between tranquillity and trepidation.
My travels in Thailand began in a city who's name you may not at first recognize: Krungthepmahanakhon Amonrattanakosin Mahintharayutthaya Mahadilokphop Noppharatratchathaniburirom Udomratchaniwetmahasathan Amonphimanawatansathit Sakkathattiyawitsanukamprasit.
Which translates as: City of Angels, Great City of Immortals, Magnificent City of the Nine Gems, Seat of the King, City of Royal Palaces, Home of Gods Incarnate, Erected by Visvakarman at Indra’s Behest.
For those who enjoy speaking in airport code...BKK. Or, if you prefer, Bangkok.
This city has it all and in abundance. I wrote about my experiences in another fb post/blog that can be found with some diligent scrolling. A proper, more easily navigable location may soon be available.
So, what's cool about Thailand? For starters, not the weather. It's hot and humid all year fluctuating between almost bearable and "are you frigin' kidding me?". Which makes a stay on a beach all the more desireable. I chose Koh Chang for over 80% of it being a National Park and, therefore less developed: hiking to waterfalls and swimming in the ocean are the order of every day. Koh Chang also offers some of the best scuba diving in the region owing to a more than 650sq mi of a protected marine park.
The largest fish in the world, the whale shark, can be found in these waters.
Kanchanaburi province borders Burma and can be reached as a day trip from Bankok. The more romantic traveler may want to ride the Death Train popularized by the book/movie "Bridge Over River Kwai". This is where more than 80,000 prisoners and slaves died constructing a railway for the occupying Japanese during WWII.
After that, you may need to lighten your spirits a bit. Spend time at the Elephants World rehabilitation park. Even after so many deaths and a constant barrage of research by animal rights organizations, Thailand still has a large elephant tourism business. Here you will see the crippled and broken bodies of one of the world's most majestic creatures. And they do seem to enjoy this level of human interaction. Please, visit here before going on an elephant treck.
The popular energy drink Red Bull was created in Thailand.
To the Northeast of BKK the mountains raise abruptly. The well-to-do of the city frequent this area to get a reprieve from the heat. I was told that owning an establishment with a Western name is more prestigious and aong my directionless bike ride I found Santa Fe, the OK Coral, Bonanza, Kinsington, and there were even a couple Italian Piazzas.
The wildlife of Khao Yai NP should not be missed either.
The smallest mammal in the world, the bumblebee bat lives in Thailand.
To the North along the border with Laos is the town of Loei. This area is far more laid back than the tourist hubs a few hours NW. You can hike in the mountains and sleep under the stars in Phu Kradueng National Park. There are caves and natural bridges. Take a bamboo raft on a lake to swim or while away the hours with a good book. Or ride a bike to the Mekong River and see how much greener the grass is on the other side.
The reticulated python is the world’s largest snake. The biggest one, found here, was over 33 feet long (10meters)!
Thailand is also home to the longest poisonous snake in the world, the king cobra.
Around the bend in Nan province you will find similar geography with a bit more individuality. The town sits in a secluded valley and for centuries, it was its own autonomous kingdom issolated from Laos to the East and Thailand to the West. Ride a bicycle or motorbike into the surrounding countryside for a day or two of breathtaking sceenery.
Thailand is the only country in Southeast Asia never to have been a European colony.
My last stop, for this partial overview, was in Thailand's second largest city: Chiang Mai. Although, with only 150,000 people there is no comparison to BKK's 8-million.
In the old, mote-encircled town the streets are narrow and filled with restaurants and accommodations to fit any level of luxury. I could have stayed for $3/nt in a hostle, but splurged on $9/nt for a private room instead.
Though, you might prefer The Dhara Dhevi Chiang Mai for only $900/nt. Breakfast is included!
Chiang Mai has a few busy streets, but for the most part it is quiet with great food; even if it is a bit more expensive than Bangkok. It's an easy cycle to Doi Inthanon (Thailand's highest peak) or take a tuk-tuk tour to wats and such. All maner of adventure are on offer to wisk you away for a day or ten.
If the street you are staying on seems desolate after sun down, the night market on Chang Klan Road is were you will find everyone. Eat till you can not take any more at the Ploen Ruedee International Food Court.
With so many different shops and bussinesses across the country its no wonder that occasionally the names, as they are translated into English, are...off.
"Boots" is a pharmacy. "Layers" sells sandals. "S'mores" is a salad place. And "Chesters" is a kid's store. "Moo Moo Pork" would seem at first glance to be equally wrong, but then I learned that Mooping is the Thai word for pig.
My favorite, though, is "Morose". They sell wedding dresses.
So, yes. Visit Thailand. See it all. Bask in the sun. Revel in the chaos. Wonder at the sights and sounds, or beter yet, find a small out of the way spot to ponder not returning home.
Thursday, November 23, 2017
A Walk in the Blue Ridge Mountains
Took a stroll through part of the Shining Rock Wilderness. Started at Big East Fork parking lot off Highway 276 just north of the Blue Ridge Parkway. Shining Creek trail on the way out and Old Butt Knob trail on the return. ~7m total.
The sun was shining bright. The air, cool. The kind of day that makes one want to break into song! …Now it all started two Thanksgivings ago, was on - two years ago on Thanksgiving, when my friend and I went up to visit Alice at the restaurant…
Only a mile or so in I ran across three unsightly characters. The first two were dead ringers as hit-men for John Gotti: grey sweat suits and all! The third was a large black rattle snake. He was sunning himself on the side of the path and scared Brutus and Clide enough to make them turn back. I stopped for a photo op and continued on. Do the Rattlesnake Shake. Make my body ache. Is it wrong to do something crazy? Is it crazy to ignore a potential danger? Is it crazier to ask such questions aloud as if the trees would answer? And the trees are all kept equal by hatchet, axe, and saw. And I saw her standing there.
Many moons ago I used to camp in these woods. I’m sure this is not the first time I have been on this particular trail. Many years since I was here. On these trails I would pass my time away. To the left and to the right, the trees towering to the sky. It's outta sight in the dead of night. It’s only one-o’clock in the afternoon, but the canopy of rhododendron is so thick you almost need a flashlight. Until we came to a side road and off the side of the side road was another 15ft cliff.
The path climbs steadily allowing for many small waterfalls and nice swimming holes. Standin' in the sunlight laughin'. Hidin' behind a rainbow's wall. Slippin' and a slidin' all along the waterfall with you. My brown eyed girl. Tail, fanny, rump rear, brown eye. Umdidlidlidle umdidleye umdidlidlidle umdidleye. Who am I? Who I am? That is the question for the ages. That’s what we are all searching for. To find out who I am. Who’s in there? Who wants to come out and say, hey, I’m hungry. Black is all I feel so this is how it feels to be free. I'm headed for a land that's far away. Beside the crystal fountains. So come with me, we'll go and see The Big Rock Candy Mountains. I don’t think I can pick up the garbage in these hadcuffs. Raspberry. Boysenberry. Strawberry. Das my jams.
Ouch!! Moth Fragments!! Rumblin, fumbling, Stumblin. And he could…fall…all…the…way! Runnin down a dream. Well I’m a rollin and tumbling. Rolling, turning, diving. Going in again. Running, scrambling, flying. Rolling, turning, diving. Rollin', rollin', rollin', man my ass is swollen, Rawhide. Tie me down, tell me lies, pull my hair, smack my thighs with a big wet strap of, Rawhide. Norm! What’s shakin? All four cheeks and a couple of chins. He’s going the distance. He’s going for speed temperatures dropping at the rotten oasis stealing kisses from the leprous faces. Got a devil’ haircut on my mind. Get a haircut and get a real job. Take this job and shove it! I ain’t working here no more. Work! Cantchya see…cantchya see…what this job…is doin to me? Gonna climb a mountain the highest mountain jump off nobody gonna know. Check the damn carabiners!! I can’t let that happen again. I can see for miles and miles I can see for see the dawn arriving I see beyond the road I’m drivin I gotta ramble on I got ta move on I’m stone free it’s time to move on it’s time to get goin.
The canopy is thinning. More pines now. Streams of sunlight have replaced the streams of water. More birds I want to fly like an eagle into the distance a river of black stretched to the point of no turning back if you choose not to decide you still have made a choice and maybe I do not have a choice and maybe that is all I have. Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle Hobbes was fond of his dram Rene Descartes was a drunken fart I drink, therefore I am I’m spunky I’m funky I like my oatmeal lumpy it's bud the spud from the bright red mud rollin' down the highway smiling Oh rockin down the highway I’m on the highway to hell.
Ooo! A shinny rock. In this case the rock is actually called Shinning Rock. That was fun! All together now...with four-part harmony in the feeling...You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant.
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